I was raised as a Jew in a kosher household and went to a synagogue on the Jewish holidays with my family. Since Judaism is also a culture I now refer to myself as a Jewish Atheist. Whenever someone used to ask me how I became an atheist, my response was always rather vague. My usual reply was that I came to the conclusion as a teenager that all concepts about god had to be fairy tales. However, after volunteering to participate in this presentation, I seriously began to think about what did lead me along this path and came to the conclusion that Eli, one of my older brothers, played the most important role in my understanding of how the world evolved

To fully appreciate how this journey of mine started you need to know a little more about my family. I was the sixth child of seven. My two sisters were born 12 and 14 years before me and my oldest brother and I shared an identical birthday, ten years apart. They obviously could not have been my playmates and never did any babysitting that I was aware of. The four youngest of the siblings always played together. Eli was two years older than Charlie, four years older than me, and eight years older than my baby brother, Henry. It was Eli who was always with us when my parents were out or were busy with other things. Further thought has brought me to the conclusion that it was from Eli that I learned about Atheism. Since he died a few years ago I phoned his daughter Adele, who assured me that she was brought up with the same view of the world.

Where we resided also has played a role in my story. I lived in New York for the first 66 years of my life. But, when our first granddaughter was born my husband and I sold our house so we could watch her grow up. Our four daughters live in different cities so we moved each time we acquired another grandchild.

In Chicago we joined a secular Jewish group and attended their programs on Sundays. It was at one of these when a Minister and a nonbeliever presented their views about God that I first found out that Atheist organizations actually existed. The Atheist speaker told us that we could sign up on his mailing list. I was amazed at the number of cities that had Atheist groups and was excited to note that when my daughter Susie and her family decided to move from New Jersey where we were at that time, to Salt Lake City that there was such a group here.

Not only is there definitive and absolute scientific proof that human beings came about through evolution, but why would a god give two atheists the best lives anyone could possibly ever have had. For me at almost 89, it still continues to be absolutely wonderful.

The fun that my three brothers and I enjoyed as young children was greatly enhanced by Eli when he made me into a tomboy. I played softball, punch ball and touch football in the street with the boys that lived on my block. When a new comer moved into our street, Eli immediately made him understand that I was one of the 'boys.' Considering this was in the 1920's, I only recently appreciated how advanced my parents were in this respect when they did not interfere with my tomboy activities. Whenever my father passed on the street while I was playing ball, after I ran up to kiss him he would always send me back to continue with the game.

My husband and I enjoyed 56 years of total bliss. He was the best human being that ever existed and was not only handsome and brilliant but also extremely ethical.

Bernie was so handsome that people were always mentioning it to me. For instance on our first date I happened to pass by the mother of one of my childhood friends. So I introduced him to her. When next I saw her the first thing she said was how good-looking he was. Even when the two of us as were already being classified as elderly, at the voting polls one of the staff commented how handsome he was.

As a Mathematical Statistician his job was to analyze data. One day in the process of doing this, Bernie discovered that a drug named "Inderal", if discontinued abruptly, could cause death. Because of his insistence that this be reported to the Food and Drug Administration, he was demoted from being the head of the department of statistics to a lowly member of the staff. This is only one example of how important ethics was to my great partner.

Actually since then anyone who has taken a medication prescribed by a physician has also benefited. All prescription drugs are no longer abruptly discontinued.

Another example of how extraordinary my darling was took place when our fourth daughter was a year old. My beloved went to my adviser at Columbia University, without telling me, and asked if she would take me back into the doctoral program. I had dropped out when I unexpectedly became pregnant with our first child. I immediately returned to school and received my Doctorate in Nutrition education six years later.

At Brooklyn College I mistakenly majored in home economics because jobs were scarce at the time and there were openings in that field. My sister- in- law Florence, the wife of my oldest brother, Lenny was currently teaching this course in a junior high school. As a student teacher I quickly recognized that cooking and sewing were not for me. Dietetics and the science of nutrition were also included in this major. Serving as the manager for executive luncheons also was too uninteresting. However, I tremendously enjoyed the fifty years of my professional life after being granted my Doctoral degree in nutrition by Columbia University. All of my positions were fascinating I developed each program from scratch and resigned each time things became dull. For example, I was the first Nutritionist at the New York City Bureau of Health to develop a weekly radio program and when I joined the staff of the "American Council on Science and Health" I established a weekly television program and also wrote a book, "Diet Modification: Can it Reduce the Risk of Heart Disease?" A physician at Columbia University applied for a grant to establish a "Maternal and Infant Care" project. Since it basically involved nutrition he asked me to set it up and see to it that it functioned properly. I did not know him, but apparently he had heard of me since I was well known in nutrition circles because of my doctoral thesis, "The Application of Computers to Nutrition " and from all of the presentations I was always being invited to give. "Weight Watchers" also came to me and asked if I would head up their organization. But, my preference was to go to serve as nutritionist with the New York City Department of Health. I also was an Adjunct Associate professor at several colleges where I primarily taught students working towards masters and doctoral degrees.

I was so active in the feminist movement from its very beginning that several years ago I was honored for my role and awarded a Certificate. My husband was also a male feminist. In fact we were so much alike in many respects that my daughter Marilyn sent us a card addressed to the "Bobbsey Twins" for our fortieth anniversary.

Our entire family is also remarkably unusual. Two of our four daughters are physicians, one is an attorney and the oldest is an artist. All have been married for substantial amounts of time to great men and have given us six delightful grandchildren. Since the current rate of divorce is one of every two marriages, I feel compelled to note that none of my daughters has ever been involved in such a situation.

My husband and I also set up our own corporation, "Statistical and Nutrition Services". Many of our clients were nursing homes, psychiatric centers and rehabilitation programs.

When my husband passed away I was devastated. But, after a while I started to socialize, just so I could talk to other people, never considering anything else. I was amazed that a young man asked me for a date when I was 80. Bob, who is in the audience, is not at all like Bernie. He frequently attends Jewish religious services and of course believes that god exists. We have been living happily together for the past 8 years, go out almost every evening and are always having fun.

I also have been in excellent health since I was born. I have not had a cold or any other infectious disease for over thirty years. However, my autoimmune system is so good that it attacked my own tissues so that I had a severe attack of arthritis. Fortunately, it is being well controlled by a drug prescribed by my rheumatologist. The only other medication I take is thyroxine. Only two drugs at my age is quite unusual.

Why would a god reward an atheist with such an amazing life! He would not and could not because there is no such entity.

I had never heard about humanism until I saw an announcement about a meeting in the Salt Lake Tribune. So here I am.

--Ruth Carol