Overall your mission statement looks pretty good, and I agree it's a good idea to state succinctly what your basic premises and goals are. Since you ask, I do have some criticism that might yield some improvement. I have a problem with the rhetorical style; it's a bit too preachy and arrogant in spots for my taste. While I sympathize with the feeling behind the assertive stance, I prefer language that is more careful to avoid the flavor of a dogmatic religion.

My perspective is that of an atheist, and a fairly militant one at that. So who am I to complain about being too arrogant, right? Well, I think it's just a matter of being sensitive to what I don't like about religion. I don't like the authoritarian approach to knowledge. I prefer science over religion, and that means seeking objectivity and verifiability as goals. I'm suspicious of anyone and any group that is too smug in their certainty and tells me they are going to "enlighten" me. It's not that I'm such a know-it-all, I might well be enlightened, but it's the presumptuousness of stating it as an introduction.

Statement one says you support the "goals and policies" of the AHA. Not a bad idea since you are a part of the AHA, but it sounds a bit like a statement of faith. Statement two defines the philosophy in terms of the Manifestos, calling them "knowledge" rather than a credo or dogma. Unfortunately, the manifestos are written like a creed. They are a statement of beliefs and assertions that we are asked to accept. Isn't that a doctrine? They may be derived from knowledge, but they are not knowledge themselves. What is really being offered is a world view, an approach or orientation for living, not a law of nature.

Statement three is the goal to "identify" all Utah humanists and "gather" them into AHA. The humanists I know are pretty independent and many of them may not want to be gathered. The statement is too presumptive, too aggressive. Couldn't we just let humanists know we are available and invite them to join us?

Statement four "recognizes" that humanism is satisfying and positive and "declares" the "intention" to spread "the knowledge" of humanism. That's too pushy, too presumptive for me. It has too much of the flavor of the manifestos. Perhaps we could "find that" humanism is satisfying rather than "recognize" that it is. After all it isn't for everyone. Maybe you could work to "increase awareness" of humanism as an alternative and provide information about humanism, rather than spreading the "knowledge."

Statement five says we will "educate" our membership. It's just the way its phrased that bothers me. so what, now we're educated? I'm probably being too picky here, but maybe we could soften that by "offering education information" to our members.

Nuts! One thing I've always disliked about AHA is the endless nitpicking over minor details, and here I go just like the rest. It's basically a good set of statements, and you're doing a good job. If this helps, good. If not, please don't worry about it.

--Chris Allen